Hi guys, was wondering if you could look over this for me... - Page 2

umm not quite...

nope, I'm such a procrastinator I guess I'll try to squeeze in a few sentences sometime today

here's the day's tidbit:

They’ll send it over right away.” The doctor seemed overworked, he had bags underneath his eyes as if he hadn’t slept in weeks, and the doctor seemed very nervous and impatient with Charles. “This is terrible, how long does she have to live?” Charles asked. “Right now, depending on how fast that blood gets here, I’d say that she will be gone within the next seventy-two hours.” After the doctor had spoken and gone back to his work, Charles stood there staring down the hallway with a blank expression on his face.
The next week, Charles was back at his office looking at Linda Mathews’ portfolio. He hadn’t found anything suspicious relating to the murder so far. After looking over the portfolio for about 45 times, he was getting tired. Just as he was closing the file, he noticed something; Linda Mathews had type O negative blood. As soon as he saw this, Charles decided not to go home, but to go to the Manhattan City General Hospital instead. When he arrived, Charles asked to see the doctor whom he had seen operating on his sister. “That night, when you needed the blood for my sister, do you happen to know exactly which blood bank gave you that blood?” Charles asked. “As a matter of fact I do. Every blood bank puts their name on the label of every packet of blood they have.” The doctor then took Charles over to the room in which his sister was recovering; somehow she had survived the crash and was beginning to heal. The doctor went to a cabinet and opened the door, inside there was spare packets of type O negative blood.

okay, gonna work on my essay now so I'll keep in touch...

Dane Cook....

thnx, I'll just have to wait and see how my teacher likes it tho

oh did I not finish it? ok, when I get home I'll post the finished product here

alright heres the finished one that I turned into my teacher:




The Linda Mathews Investigation
After a long day at work, Charles Rolcom unlocked the door to his shabby little apartment in downtown Manhattan. Charles was an interesting man, tall and sturdy like a tree. He would have been the perfect football player were it not for his career as a homicide detective. Charles was an intelligent man, he could sense when something was wrong, and he had a keen ability to inspect every detail and could look at things in many perspectives. Once he came into his apartment, he looked for something to nourish his hunger. After having his fill of a half-eaten sub sandwich, he turned on his television so he could relax. He was watching the news, the reporter sounded grim, “The body of a young woman was found in a bathroom in a local shopping mall. The report says the killer had sliced the victim open and taken out her liver and kidneys. Investigators say it is the body of 36-year-old Linda Matthews; she worked as a nurse for Dr. Sanchez V. Liston who runs an emergency clinic on South Avenue. But there is yet another twist to this surprising story, the victim also had 4 stab wounds each one completely severing a major artery in her torso. The killer had obviously known what he was doing to be able to locate exactly where each artery was. But perhaps the most shocking thing about this heinous crime is that there was absolutely no blood anywhere at the crime scene, investigators say it is impossible to explain. On a much lighter note—” Charles turned off the television. He knew that he would have to begin researching the crime in the morning, so he quickly brushed his teeth and got ready for bed.
“Walter, do you have the info on Linda Mathews I asked for?” Charles asked his assistant. “Right here sir, her childhood, her family, date of birth, everything but the kitchen sink.” His assistant said. “Great, thanks.” Charles took the portfolio of Linda Mathews into his office. He began with her childhood: “Hmm…born June 3rd, 1970. Parents are Marcos and Jennifer Mathews. She went to a medical school in Indiana. Wait…here’s something, her previous employers worked at a mortuary, an organ donation center, and a blood bank. This girl really liked death.” “Walter, get me the profile of Dr. Sanchez V. Liston. Got it?” “Yes sir” he replied. “While he does that”—Charles thought to himself—“I’m going to go talk to her parents.” “She was such a nice girl. I don’t know why anyone would want to do such a horrible thing to my girl.” Jennifer Mathews said. “She always was trying to do the right thing. The only thing bad about her was that she was very inquisitive.” “Tell me, what made her decide to leave her old jobs?” Charles asked. “All of her employers said that she was asking too many questions about the business, even Dr. Liston said that.” Marcos said. “Tell me”—Said Charles—“what kind of questions was she asking?” “Most of the time, she was asking about how the business stayed open even when they didn’t have any clients” Marcos said.” “Okay, thank you for your time; I hope I didn’t disturb you.” Said Charles. “I want you to find the killer, lock him away forever. Make sure he never comes out again.” Marcos replied. “I’ll do my best.” The day was rather long and boring for Charles after that; he hadn’t gotten any leads, and there was a pile of paperwork waiting for Charles back at his office.
It was two-thirty in the morning when the telephone rang. Charles sleepily got out of bed to answer it. “Hello?” Charles said. “Charles Rolcom?” The woman on the other line sounded stressed. “This is he. What’s the problem? ” Charles answered back. “Charles, this is Bethany Stouhl down at the Manhattan City General Hospital, and I’m afraid I have some terrible news.” “What happened? Is something wrong?” Charles began to sound frantic. His heart was beating faster, and he began to wonder what the hospital could be calling him about this early in the morning. “It’s your sister”—Bethany replied—“She’s been in a car accident, it was a head-on collision, the other driver was doing 80. Its bad, she’s in the emergency room, I suggest you come over here right away.” “I’m on my way!” Charles hurriedly put on his usual attire and raced to the hospital. “Doctor! How is she?” Charles huffed; he was out of breath after running up four flights of stairs. “She’s in critical condition.” “Is she going to be alright?” “We don’t know, she lost a lot of blood and most of her bones are broken. She also has several hemorrhages in her brain. As far as we know, every minute that passes could be her last.” “Blood, how much blood does she need?” “She lost almost all of it, unfortunately we just ran out of type O negative type blood, but we just called the only blood bank that was open, and they said they just got a new shipment of type O negative blood. They’ll send it over right away.” The doctor seemed overworked, he had bags underneath his eyes as if he hadn’t slept in weeks, and the doctor seemed very nervous and impatient with Charles. “This is terrible, how long does she have to live?” Charles asked. “Right now, depending on how fast that blood gets here, I’d say that she will be gone within the next seventy-two hours.” After the doctor had spoken and gone back to his work, Charles stood there staring down the hallway with a blank expression on his face.
The next week, Charles was back at his office looking at Linda Mathews’ portfolio. He hadn’t found anything suspicious relating to the murder so far. After looking over the portfolio for about 45 times, he was getting tired. Just as he was closing the file, he noticed something; Linda Mathews had type O negative blood. As soon as he saw this, Charles decided not to go home, but to go to the Manhattan City General Hospital instead. When he arrived, Charles asked to see the doctor whom he had seen operating on his sister. “That night, when you needed the blood for my sister, do you happen to know exactly which blood bank gave you that blood?” Charles asked. “As a matter of fact I do. Every blood bank puts their name on the label of every packet of blood they have.” The doctor then took Charles over to the room in which his sister was recovering; somehow she had survived the crash and was beginning to heal. While Charles was kneeling at his sister’s bedside looking at her battered face, the doctor went over to a cabinet and opened the door, inside there was spare packets of type O negative blood. “Here, Manhattan Blood Donation Centre.” The doctor said, pointing to one of the blood packets. “Thank you so much doctor.” Charles said. Charles shook the doctor’s hand in gratification and then hurried to his office.
At his office, Charles found the connection between Linda Mathews’ murder, and his sister’s car accident: Linda Mathews had worked in the same blood bank that his sister received her blood from. Now that Charles had a lead, he went to the crime scene, even though he didn’t expect to find anything since it was several weeks since the murder. Sure enough, everything was back to normal and nothing was left of the murder. Charles felt disappointed for a few moments, but felt a new hope after remembering that other investigators took pictures of the crime scene. “There had to have been a struggle.”—Charles thought to himself—“There also had to have been more than one person involved in killing her. How else could she have been stabbed without a drop of blood coming onto the floor? The killer also had to have had some sort of medical knowledge in order to have stabbed her precisely where a major artery was located. Linda obviously had known something she wasn’t supposed to know.” Deciding that he had made enough progress for the day, Charles headed home.
The next day, Charles went directly to the Manhattan Blood Donation Centre to ask the owner questions about Linda Mathews. “Yes it’s a terrible thing, what happened to Linda, she was a good girl.” The owner of the blood bank, James Elm, said to Charles. “Tell me,”—asked Charles—“what made you decide to release her from her position in your donation centre?” “She was asking too many questions about our financial situation.” James responded. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a lot of work to do and I don’t like it when people interfere with my work.” James said again. As Charles was leaving, he noticed that James’ work planner was completely empty, and that he had virtually no clients to tend to. James Elm was beginning to look very suspicious to Charles. Charles had not discovered anything new or gotten any new leads for the rest of the day, so he decided to continue his work later.
The next day, Charles went to Dr. Sanchez Liston’s office to ask him questions about Linda Mathews as well. As Charles expected, he got a similar response as he did when questioning James Elm. “And what exactly is it that you want to find out Mr. Rolcom?” the doctor asked. “I am investigating the murder of Linda Mathews, she was you’re nurse, correct?” Charles replied. “Yes, but that’s no concern of you. My business practices are to remain confidential.” Charles noticed that Dr. Liston was attempting to dodge his questions. “I understand that you keep a record of all of you’re employees; would you mind showing me Linda Mathews’ record?” Charles knew that there wouldn’t be anything suspicious in the record; he simply asked to see it to know what the doctor’s response would be. “Again sir, that information is strictly confidential, and it is none of you’re concern.” Charles realized that the doctor was not going to give him any information regarding Linda Mathews. “Well then, thank you for you’re time; I hope I didn’t disturb you too much.” Charles politely held out his hand to shake with the doctor, but the doctor did not do Charles the same service. “Yes thank you, I believe you can show yourself to the door.”
Charles was getting tired of interviewing people and not getting any decent responses. He knew that it the murder had to have been a group effort and that they had to have worked fast and leave without any suspicions. While Charles sat on his couch trying to come up with a connection, he thought of his sister. Then it clicked, he knew who the killer was and why they had killed her; but before he could arrest the killer, he had to go and question another of Linda’s employers.
Charles had gone to the organ donation center that had employed Linda. “So tell me Mr. Karter, how often do receive donations?” Charles asked. “We get donations every day, but we keep a record on every new donation that comes in.” Mr. Karter replied. This was the first employer that Charles had talked to who did not give vague and useless answers. “Do you have a record of a liver and a pair of kidneys being brought in on January the twenty-third of this year?” Charles asked. This was the day after Linda Mathews’ body was found. “I believe I do.” Mr. Karter said walking over to a file cabinet. He pulled out a file that which contained the exact specifications that Charles was looking for. Charles looked over the file closely and found that every record had the name the previous ‘organ holder’; but the record that he was looking at did not have a name to connect with the donated organs. Charles had seen enough, he had what he wanted, and so he thanked Mr. Karter and then left.
The next day, Charles got a warrant to look at the financial situation of all of Linda Mathews’ employers. As Charles had expected, all of the businesses had more than sufficient funds. After finding out how well each business was doing, Charles decided to take his case to the chief of the Manhattan Police department to get a warrant for the arrest of Dr. Sanchez Liston, James Elm, and Mr. Mark Karter. After the chief of police had arrested all three men, Charles explained to them how he had figured out that it was them. “I started to think about it very hard after my sister had gotten into that car crash. Linda was a person who questioned everything; that is why you killed her. She was asking too many questions about you’re businesses. Dr. Sanchez, one day, while nobody was around, she began to look through you’re files and noticed that you had more money in you’re bank account than you did the day before. She knew that you had so much more money that it was impossible to earn that much in one day, is that correct Dr. Sanchez?” Dr. Sanchez said nothing, but looked down at his feet. Charles continued: “The same thing happened to you too, Mr. Karter, and you Mr. Elm. That is why you released her from her job in the first place. What Linda found out was that all three of you had a counterfeit money operation together. You were scared that she would go to the police and have you arrested, so you decided to kill her. Dr. Sanchez, you as a doctor, could do the actual killing, while James could collect the blood that you drained, while Mr. Karter could remove a liver and her two kidneys. The only problem was that the only place that you could find her was in a public shopping mall. Don’t you find it suspicious that an organ donation center and a blood bank get a donation on the exact same day and time, without a name?” All three of them pled guilty during the trial and were sentenced to life in prison. Linda Mathews’ parents were greatly relieved that the killers had been captured. Although that had been the highlight case of his life, Charles went on to solve many more crime cases, and eventually opened his own private investigation service.