I’m at Dell Headquarters in Austin, Texas and I just came across this thread. I have to admire your honesty in trying to track down the rightful owner of the system. It sounds like it was probably issues of customer privacy that prevented the people you spoke with from being able to put you in touch with the person who bought the laptop. Admittedly, I've never dealt with a situation where someone was trying to return a stolen laptop but it seems as though our strict policy of not sharing customer information might be preventing someone from getting their laptop back.
I clearly must follow the same policy so I can't send you the customer’s information either but I can definitely either pass yours along to them or capture the system and send it from Dell HQ. In order for the servicetag to be labeled as stolen, they must have called in to report it so there should be records of all that here. Again, I really appreciate you wanting to give the system back and I’m sure they’ll be pleasantly surprised.