Introducing the NEW Go-L Detroit GOLD
Go-L is proud to present our first automotive offering, the amazing Detroit GOLD
. It's not just a car, but a complete automotive experience. Take a look at the features that come standard on the new Go-L Detroit GOLD
The "Stay-Stopped" System: Most cars on the market today come with brakes. But brakes are only effective when you step on them. We here at Go-L have developed the exciting new "Stay-Stopped" sysem that will allow you to park your car, and have it stay where you left it! See the image above for how the new "Stay-Stopped" system works! (Hint: It's the wooden block we've jammed under the back tires).
"Accu-Steer" Technology: The Detroit GOLD
features Go-L's exclusive "Accu-Steer" technology. Want to tun right? You just turned the Trajectory Interface Device to the right. Want to turn left? Just turn the Trajectory Interface Device left. What's the secret to this amazing new Trajectory Interface Device? Nothing, really... it's just a steering wheel, but we've come up with a brand-new cool-sounding name for it! That's the Go-L difference!
"Thermo-Blast" Heating System: The Thermo-Blast heating system keeps your Go-L Detroit Gold
warm even on the coldest winter days. Forget your jacket? Just activate the Thermo-Blast system by running something heavy into the back end of your Go-L Detroit GOLD
. This activates a chain reaction that will not only keep the Go-L Detroit GOLD
warm, but will also activate our exclusive [Note from marketing department: We need a good name for this. So far all we've been able to come up with is "Blow Your Ass To Kingdom Come"] technology, which is guaranteed to impress anyone.
Convertible Top: Our competitors do not offer a convertible top on their machines, but you get one one the Go-L Detroit Gold
. When the Thermo-Blast system is activated, the roof will detract (well, actually, it's blown off by the force of the explosion, possibly decapitating you in the process, but damn it's cool).
And you get all this for the low, low price of only $45,000! But wait, there's more! Every Go-L Detroit GOLD
comes with a genuine rock hot-glued to the dashboard! This is a real rock, not an imitation. Can you believe it? A rock. Wow.